Stuart Explains Television: Scifi Reality?
From http://www.unamerican.com/
I’m going to spell this out. Sci-fi stands for Science Fiction. With this fresh in mind – the only television station with FICTION in it’s name is premiering two new reality television shows. While I’m aware that reality television is scripted enough to only be borderline realistic, there is one thing I’m certain of: There are not nearly enough dinosaurs, trolls, or rocket-ships for this to be on the Sci-fi channel. All kneel before my superior logic.
Lets check them out.
Who Wants To Be A Superhero? 5/5 “head-ons”
Ok, so this one has already happened. Nevermind that there were two seasons. The whole idea of this show is baffling to me. Listen: you’re not a superhero, you can’t be a superhero, superheros don’t exist. Get off the geekwagon and get a job. With superheros like “Cell Phone Girl,” “Fat Mamma,” and “Mr. Mitzvah” it’s not just reality that’s taken a major hit. If I was a superhero, I would be “Nerdophobe” and zealously purge humanity’s ranks of these people. If you’re feeling the need to escape reality so bad, let me give you a quick ticket to the land of fairies and rainbows.
Comic book nerds I can stand (I’m a little nerdy myself), but this is an entirely new breed.
Estate of Panic!!!!! (exclamation points added for emphasis) 4/5 “head-ons”
It’s fear factor. We’ve seen it.
Cha$e!!!! (also emphasized) 4/5 “head-ons”
This game is a combination of Terminator 1-3 and tag, except the people chasing you down have fancy molded-plastic sunglasses. This make it look futuristic to some, or to the majority of people, borderline retarded.
Contestants run through an abandoned warehouse area, and are given tools (sunglasses that make them invisible??) to keep from being caught by the “hunters,” which are people that act like robots (because killer robots do not actually exist). The exit point opens up at the end of the game, and the first person in wins money. This show could have been adapted to any channel, but for some reason Scifi picked it up and probably added all the “futuristic” ideas. Avoid at all costs.
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I explain:
Scifi is for killer space zombie dragons that live under the sea. Not for this garbage. Put this shit on FOX.
Slate beat me to it.
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